There is nothing in this world quite like the smell of a newborn baby, their soft skin, tiny features, their coos and occasional screams and the overall feeling of happiness you feel just by holding their fragile body in your hands. These moments you want to bottle up and hope that they last forever. Unfortunately they don’t and I have an almost 3 year old to prove it. Time goes by way too quickly. Chances are you are a new mom, a mom of 3, a mom who just attended your kid’s high school graduation or a mom who has just experienced for the first time the feeling of becoming a grandparent. Wherever you are in life, I am sure we can all agree that the days are long but the years are short.
As I sit here typing one handed while Nash is in the other, surrounded by newspaper flyers, empty water bottles, baby wipes and granola wrappers, I am content. This moment right here, right now, won’t last forever. I look around the playroom which was once covered with activity mats and stacking rubber blocks now has ABC flash cards, puzzles and play makeup sets. All for a little girl that just wants to be big. A grown up like her mommy and to go to work for the day like her daddy. I wish she knew how magical it is to be a child. How much fun it is, easy going and how wonderful it is to be taken care of every day and not have to worry about how she got the clothes on her back or the yogurt in her hand.
Nash is stirring now. He is hungry…..again. I really wanted to get that pile of laundry folded, the dishes done, maybe even drink my cup of coffee that has been sitting out for two hours now but I don’t see those things happening. My laundry pile will get bigger and my cold cup of coffee will get added to the pile of dishes.
Nash nurses like it’s his job. I am at his constant beck and call. I’m sore, tired, my face is lacking in any type of blush or foundation to cover up the darkness under my eyes, none of my clothes fit and any that do are covered in some sort of human spit-up or poop, and I wonder if I will ever be able to walk around the house without a nursing pillow attached to my hip again. Still, I am content.
Isla jumps up onto the couch beside me. I feel like telling her for the 50th time not to do that but instead I pull her in close. I look at her, stroke her face, look at her not so little hands and twirl her hair around my fingers. I look down at my baby boy and instantly remember seeing Isla laying there, so small and so innocent. Now she is a growing girl with little friends of her own and dreams of what she wants to be. This little boy who I brought into this world is laying in my arms, comfortable, satisfied and putting his trust in me to keep him safe and raise him right just like his big sister.
I look around my messy house and quickly forget about my list of to-dos. None of it matters. I will enjoy every moment with my little boy and my growing family. I will remember how quickly moments pass you by and I will remember that like the flip of a switch my boy will be running around and playing with his sister instead of being cuddled up in the safeness of my arms. Isla will go to her first sleepover, start school and continue to find herself every day. The sadness and excitement I feel all at the same time is a strange but very real emotion. The future is bright for us all but I am really enjoying the present. This moment right here with my baby boy and my little girl snuggled in tight with me. No sounds, just their little breaths and my heart exploding with unconditional love. I am truly content.